You see, Kelly Olsen is the mother whose nickname is "Mom"; the wife whose nickname is "Honey"; the friend whose nickname is "Hey You", and the mortician whose nickname is "Crazy", because most people respond with "you must be crazy" when I tell them what I do to earn a living.
But as of today, I've decided that I'm now Kelly M. Olsen - the new and improved me...wait, that is redundent, isn't it? I'm now all of those things I just listed, as well as fiction writer and blogger. I don't actually know which level of achievement I must reach before I deserve to have the M. in my name; maybe its when I reach 100 000 hits on my blog, or when I can call myself a published author - not a self-published author, though; that is the kiss of death for those who want to be taken seriously as a writer - but I'm going to risk penalty of death by declaring myself important enough today to have the M. in my name.
Or, maybe I can even go a step further and become K.M. Olsen...Oh yes! Now that sounds like an author's name, right? It's ambiguous enough to sound mysterious - I could be male or female. It's simple enough to be memorable - because nobody would remember either of my two former last names: Palfrey and Letourneau (I'm glad I got rid of those, especially the last one). I like K.M. Olsen; I like it a lot. But maybe I'm being pretentious to think that people would actually refer to me as K.M. I wonder if people call J.K. Rowling as J.K.?
I'm babbling...so for now, I guess you can call me Kelly. But I'm warning ya - as soon as I get to 100 000 followers, I'm going to insist you call me Kelly M. Am I clear?
I'll talk at you tomorrow...